"You will suffer a terrible loss and within weeks people are saying “you’ll find closure or you’ve found it. You’ll get through it or you’ll get over it” & those things don’t help at all because tarrying with the mysteries, doubts and uncertainties is also part of being alive. We don’t have to always find closure or solve the problem or get over it. It’s also possible to dwell thoughtfully and imaginatively with those things that are hurtful or resist understanding or that seem to operate according to their own timing, separate from the timing of our world. It is okay, and indeed centrally important to reserve a part of life that dwells with certain uncertainties"